slips,trips and others falters

I am susceptible. i will admit it. And when I am already anxious about a trip or appointment then someone talks about a trigger oh man.. thats it!
I am just running out of there or changing the channel or whatever to get back in control.
I men it can be totally innocent or a great thing for someone else and I am sitting there feeling like I am just gonna die! and then there are the times you feel absolutely stupid about a trigger. Oh I just hate those times. And there is no should or outta, its just panic, plain and simple..

breathe in.. 1234.. and out ...12345678
and in 1234 and out 12345678
focus, your ok, your safe, your ok..
you feel like there is someone ripping you apart but in your mind you think 1234... 12345678...
breathe.. breathe.. i am ok.. I am ok.. I AM F*&%ING OK! and you really want to think and be just that.

and your family is tiptoeing and you have no friends left because if they say the wrong thing thats it you just want to run away.

and you just want to do what they say and be normal and fine..

and int he mean time you breathe in 1234... out 12345678