Talk about a life filled with pain and sacrifice where no one even notices. In fact if you change and stop giving so much some people even take the tact of getting mad at you!
So then what do you do? how do you deal with it. I say let them get mad. Let them not have their big screen TV or their high end whatever so you can have what you need, maybe a spa day or a massage baby!
Maybe they just need to get up and move a little and get going with something of their own to make a little ends meet instead of just sitting there.
So what are my shoulds..
I should make my husband happy. This is an impossibility. No matter what I cannot make him happy. Now you can work and fill someones needs, and you can be there. But you can't make them happy! You cant make them anything. honest. Really. You cant. even if you want to.
I should have perfect kids. Oh man this is a media nightmare that has been created in movies and on TV. quiet cute kids that don't puke on you unless its in comedic timing. Or the child that only farts when it funny. All the beautiful little children that sit so quietly at all the right moments unless they are Dennis the menace. Well guess what, I live with Dennis and he never stops. It not comedic or in goof timing either. Its frustrating,especially at 10 o clock at night when you are and just want to fall into bed, especially when your hubby wants you to fall into his arms.
I should have a clean house. Really? With kids? are you sure? I mean are you really sure? I mean with them running in and out and pulling clothes out and ruining everything you just put away! um.. I would prefer a clean house, but it will have to wait for after they are in college I think.
And that's just my first three!
When we came to the world we came alone, even in the case of twins, triplets, quad, and etc.
ReplyDeleteWhy did we not draw our first breathe at the same time with another person? Why are our finger prints unique from another person? Why are we different?
Could it be that our creator wanted us to be the best we can be? Could this be that he already instill in us what we need to find happiness and self identity?
I should make my husband happy, you asked. Question here is "Should you?". Ask yourself: Are you losing you in the process? He must make himself happy...if he can't then, no matter what you do even like you climbing MT. Everest, he is blind to your efforts and loving intention for him.
Perfect Kids, my sweetest dearest friend. No such thing is perfect kids. Because Perfect Kids live in the eyes of the beholders. Find the gratitude in you that you live with Dennis. That you get to see their muddy hands, you get to see them wiping their muddy feet on your floor while looking up and smile at you with childlike admiration. As tired you may be at the end of the day, think of the people who never get to experience like you experience.
A clean house. can you live in a museum, or ( a mosel... you get the picture). A clean house is a house. But you want a HOME. Ask your heart, do you want a clean house or you want your home...
Be careful what you wish for...
I think you are doing what it is ask of you in your pursuit of a mother, a wife, a daughter, and a friend. For that, you are special and enough.
I love you for you being you. Nothing more and nothing less. Just the way you are. xo